3.30.2005

Moment of Silence: Johnnie Cochran



To steal a phrase from Ian, all the guilty mofos have to find someone else to defend them, because Cochran died yesterday, March 29, after battling an inoperable brain tumor.

Clients included:

Elmer "Geronimo" Pratt, Black Panther leader convicted of murdering a schoolteacher in 1972 and sentenced to 25 to life -- Cochran lost the case but continued to work to free Pratt, eventually having his conviction overturned in 1997;

Todd Bridges of " Diff'rent Strokes", acquitted of being crackidy cracked up and shooting/stabbing a dealer at a crack house;

Crazyface, aka Michael Jackson, for his first legally reportedtrist with a young boy, settled out of court for around $25 mil.;

Tupac Shakur for sexual abuse;

O.J. Simpson, of course;

Snoop Dogg, murder was the case, baby. Acquitted in 1996 of being an accessory to the murder of a man shot by his bodyguard. Bodyguard was also acquitted;

Sean Combs, remember when you were still with J.Ho. and got swept up in that whole bribery/gun posession/shooting thing at the Manhattan night club? And then you were acquitted? You'd better be at J.C.'s funeral, too.

Thanks, Johnnie. For keeping all these freaks and celebs out of jail. I don't know what the tabloids would have done without you. But, in all seriousness, if I were to be accused of a high-profile crime you damn well better bet that J.C. would be the first one I'd call.

Anonymous at 10:42 AM

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