If Blue States Secede

Via Tennessee Guerilla Women:

Dear Red States,

We're ticked off at the way you've treated California, and we've decided we're leaving.

We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast.

We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

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I would like to amend this statement of intents by indicating that we will trade Grand Rapids for Austin, because any place that gave us Bill Hicks is good in my book. Maybe we’ll take Dallas, too, but only if BOMT regular Kurt doesn’t enlist in our emergency relocation program.

annamaria at 11:01 AM

4 spoke


at Monday, June 20, 2005 11:31:00 PM Blogger Dane meets Simone said...

As a native of North Texas, I really must insist that you leave Dallas behind.

at Tuesday, June 21, 2005 7:54:00 AM Blogger annamaria said...

You heard the lady, Kurt: start packing your bags.

at Tuesday, June 21, 2005 12:47:00 PM Blogger Kurt said...

You're probably gonna need a safe house here, plus someone has to stand up por los mojados!
Dane, we really should take Fort Worth! We can make Austin an embassy!
"All my bags are packed,
I'm ready to go.
I'm standing here,
Outside your door..."
Anyone old enough to know that one?

at Tuesday, June 21, 2005 2:21:00 PM Blogger Kurt said...

OK, one other thing. I'll need some guaranteed federal aid to assist me and my family with the emotional turmoil of leaving behind the only life they have known (I lived in CT for 20 years). And housing allowance. With high-speed Net access. Probably a per diem for expenses until we get settled (probably not more than 5 years). Of course, different locations will cost more than others....do I get to choose? Perhaps we can spend six months to a year in several before we have to decide.


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