blood on my teeth

Sorry, Souter. Bet you didn't think that was going to happen...

Don't look so sad, Souter.
Losing your family home will help your community, after all.

We didn't really talk to much about the eminent domain decision last week. Maybe it is because neither of us are homeowners, and, being Liberal, we are only concerned with what concerns us.

Oh, wait. I think that's another party...

But this story is just too good to pass up.

It seems that someone has more balls than I ever thought possible -- Logan Clements, CEO of Freestar Media (fighter of government repression through his Web site and cable [access?] show), has suggested taking over Supreme Court Justice Souter's New Hampshire farmhouse and turning it into a hotel.

The rationale? That the hotel will better serve the public interest, bringing economic development, higher tax revenue, and more jobs to the town of Weare.

The name of the hotel? Lost Liberty.

The in-hotel restaurant? Just Desserts Cafe.

Anonymous at 12:53 PM

5 spoke

6.29.2005

Apparently, we are on the right track.

For those of you who had to sit through Bush's speech last night, and did not have the luxury of having to miss it for puppy class, I'm sure that you were motivated, inspired...

Okay.

I'll cut the crap.

Maybe you found the fact that the White House Advance Team faked the applause a little humorous. Or completely disturbing.

Me? I read through the speech with a smirk, and tallied all of the catchwords that were supposed to get us lowly commonfolk inspired.

So, here's the count:

Sept. 11: 5
Freedom: 21
Osama bin Laden: 2
Saddam Hussein: 2
Some form of "War is hard.": 8
Terror/Terrorists/Terrorism: 34
"They": 39

Mistake: 1 (In discussing a deadline for pulling troops)
Weapons: 3 (Never in context of WMDs)

Iraq: 92
"Mission Accomplished": 0

Anonymous at 12:33 PM

That's why you keep your ice on your hand.

Russian President Vladimir Putin apparently likes things that sparkle.

And that don't belong to him.

While meeting business execs in a palace near St. Petersburg, New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft took off his ring for Putin to check out.

Putin tried it on, slipped it in his pocket, and left.

Oopsies. Now you have learned your lesson, Robert, that you do not give things to foreign diplomats that you don't intend for them to keep.

Anonymous at 12:01 PM

Damn you, Canada

Sometimes being a Detroiter sucks. Particularly when you can look across the Detroit River and gaze at Canada, only to realize that despite their funny accents, those damn Canucks are seemingly doing everything in their power to make us look bad.

For example: Canada has just become the third nation in the world to achieve marriage equality. Fuckers. Michigan spent last year passing an asinine proposal which denies not only marriage and civil union rights to same-sex couples, but effectively denies domestic partnership benefits to municipal employees. Canada, on the other hand, has a Prime Minister who says things like this:

"We are a nation of minorities," Mr Martin said. "And in a nation of minorities, it is important that you don't cherry-pick rights. A right is a right, and that is what this vote tonight is all about."

Where the fuck does Canada get off being so damn cool?

Labels: LGBT

annamaria at 11:31 AM

6.28.2005

We all know how much I hate Wal-Mart...

If you are interested, I can forward you a copy of the grad project I completed on Wal-Mart's recent trouble with the ladies, and how they are not paying them shit.

Anyway. Now there is this. I want to say something funny and snarky, but can't bring myself to do it. Someone else please step in.

Not that I feel bad -- he was a ranking member of the board of directors.

But, whatever...I've caved while writing this post. I'll now stoop to taunting a dead man.

Can't take that $20 billion with you, eh? Maybe you should have paid your female employees a living fucking wage, rather than watching your money earn interest in the bank.

< sigh >

Okay. I'm done.

Anonymous at 11:07 AM

6.27.2005

QAF 507: Do you realize this season is well over half done?

What did I say last week about Lindsay's stupid parents? Lindsay moves into their house, assuming that a sympathetic gesture is just that, only to find out that her parents only offered her a place in their home because they thought the lesbian in her was cold and dead.

Let's get this straight. Sam Auerbach wasn't a man. Sam could have been a woman – Lindsay still would have fucked her. It wasn’t so much the gender as it was the person, especially since she was feeling so put off by Mel at home (hard to believe, I know).

So, when Lindsay and Gus move back to the 'rents, she thinks that it is a kind gesture. A way for her to get back on her feet. Of course, her first day in their home, the Petersons throw a dinner party, to which they invite a young man for Lindsay to conversate with.

You see where this is going, right? So I don’t have to go further.

It's a set up. Mom wants Lindsay to have sex with men; Lindsay says she likes sex with women; Lindsay goes to see Mel to complain; Mel invites Lindsay to stay until she gets back on her feet.

And so the stage is set for the big lesbian get-back-together, that all of us knew, and didn't care, would happen.

You must be wondering by now, "Why all this talk about the lesbians? What about Brian and Justin?"

Well, what about Brian and Justin…

Justin completes his rapid change in identity, preferring cooking to cock, in record time. He wants Brian. Only Brian. And domesticity. And a house with a picket fence. And babies.

And, most importantly, to be told "I love you."

I think that if Brian would concede to this one little request, Justin would be so much more receptive to everything else. He just wants a sign that Brian cares for him.

Since he is apparently blind and can't see signs like the rest of us can, he was forced to leave Brian in what can only be described as the most heart-wrenching scene in QAF history.

Follow up this scene with Brian getting terribly drunk and pounding on the Stepford Fags' door at what can only be assumed is a very late hour. (Who am I kidding -- it very well could have been 10:15 p.m.) The exchange between Brian and Michael, over the "infection" of Justin and his recent desire to settle down, is probably the closest that Brian can come to say that he loves Justin, without saying the words.

According to Annamaria:

It's interesting that he blames it all on Michael, though. And Michael's response about how no one would want to be with Brian. What an asshole! What, since he's all cozy-cozy with Ben, he can't remember how he pined after Brian for 15 fucking years! I'm obviously crossing my fingers that this will cause an irreparable rift between Brian and Michael!

Amen to that. The end of having to see Michael? That would be the greatest.

And how about Michael, by the way, completely forgetting about Hunter and trying force Ben to get over his loss by going to get some throw pillows? Seriously. Has this boy-man developed mentally past the age of 13?

Justin: "That's not love. That's sacrifice."
Anyone else notice Jennifer's knowing "hmmm" in the new cockroach condo? Almost saying isn't love all about making sacrifices?

Doesn't Justin even notice the ways that Brian has change for him? I mean, Christ. He emptied out a fucking drawer for him.

And then there is Ted and Troy. Does anyone else think there was a better way to handle that situation, especially since it seemed that Ted had fallen for him? Maybe a "hey you shouldn't be so mean to the pity fucks, because I was one once and I had started this relationship to get back at you but now I really like you and can you please not be mean to your pity fucks anymore?" How about that?

And then next week there is Emmitt and DREW! How excited was I to see that little glimpse of his face in the previews for next week! I'm practically giddy just thinking about it.

And then, of course, there’s the Brian/Brandon who-can-fuck-the-fastest competition.

Let's have a recap:

Hot and not. End of contest.

Brian can have his body but not him? I don’t think that, in the end, Brian's even going to take his body. He's just not...cute. And he's also not Justin.

I still think that it's not too late to replace and refilm all of Brandon's scenes with the guy who played Smith Jerrod on SATC.

Yes, yes, yes. Much better.

Labels: QAF

Anonymous at 4:45 PM

Lifesite: Your daily dose of stupidity

Ever notice that all polygamists are ugly, hairy bastards?

So, I decided to pay a visit to ~~our friends at~~ Lifesite, because I thought they would have some wonderfully ridiculous responses to the Supreme’s decision on the Ten Commandments. No such luck. But I did manage to find something even better:

ACLU Now Defends Polygamy, Further Eroding Traditional Marriage
(AgapePress) - In comments at an Ivy League school, the president of the American Civil Liberties Union has indicated that among the "fundamental rights" of people is the right to polygamous relationships -- and that the ACLU has defended and will continue to defend that right.

In a little-reported speech offered at Yale University earlier this year, ACLU president Nadine Strossen stated that her organization has "defended the right of individuals to engage in polygamy." Yale Daily News says Strossen was responding to a "student's question about gay marriage, bigamy, and polygamy." She continued, saying that her legal organization "defend[s] the freedom of choice for mature, consenting individuals," making the ACLU "the guardian of liberty ... defend[ing] the fundamental rights of all people."

Crawford Broadcasting radio talk-show host Paul McGuire concurs. He says in his opinion, the ACLU "has declared legal war on the traditional family."

Wow. McGuire’s comments are pretty damning since we all know that radio talk-show hosts are the official arbiters of culture and civilization. But, let’s play for a second, shall we? Because the right has a really convenient definition of traditional marriage/family, meaning they define it as whatever they want marriage to look like, history be damned. But since the only convincing arguments (for me, anyway) against marriage equality are religious ones*, let’s look at what the Bible has to say about polygamy:

Exodus 21:10 (New International Version)
10 If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights
1 Kings 11:3 (New International Version)
3 He (Solomon) had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines...
2 Chronicles 11:21 (New International Version)
21 Rehoboam loved Maacah daughter of Absalom more than any of his other wives and concubines. In all, he had eighteen wives and sixty concubines, twenty-eight sons and sixty daughters.
Deuteronomy 21:15 (New International Version)
15 If a man has two wives, and he loves one but not the other, and both bear him sons but the firstborn is the son of the wife he does not love…

Yes, I realize that all of the above are from the Old Testament, but I was Catholic once, and even I remember that Jesus said "Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law (the Old Testament) or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke or a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law (the Old Testament) until everything is accomplished. (Matthew 5:17-18)" That means that Jesus tacitly approved of polygamy.

In fact, it wasn’t until Reynolds v United States in 1878 that polygamy was outlawed in the US. So, the concept of marriage as being solely between one man and one woman is a rather recent development.

Let’s get back to the article, though:

"Now the ACLU is defending polygamy," he continues, in response to Strossen's comments. "You know, there are male and female lawyers who wake up in the morning and are actually proud of being ACLU lawyers. But I think the majority of Americans view ACLU lawyers as people who hate America and who want to destroy all Judeo-Christian values and beliefs."

Given the above passages from the Bible, it would appear as if the ACLU is doing a better job of defending certain "Judeo-Christian values and beliefs" than McGuire and his ilk.

And, you know what, I’m really fucking tired of people smearing the ACLU. It reminds me of that scene in that horrible movie, The American President, where stupid Senator Richard Dreyfuss calls President Michael Douglas out for being a member of the ACLU, and he replies by saying "For the record: Yes, I am a card-carrying member of the A.C.L.U. But the more important question is why aren't you, Bob? This is an organization whose sole purpose is to defend the Bill of Rights, so it naturally begs the question: Why would a senator, his party's most powerful spokesman and a candidate for President, choose to reject upholding the Constitution?" (Thank you, wikipedia). That was the only decent bit of dialogue in that entire god-forsaken movie, and damn if it isn’t right on.
-----------------
* That said, because the only reasons are religious, they're moot. Read the Establishment Clause, people.

annamaria at 2:35 PM

As it should be: No pushing your Jesus pieces on me

Even though your house is no longer safe, the Supreme Court made the correct decision on Mondayto restrict the display of the 10 Commandments in courthouses.

As always, it was a 5-4. I bet that you will never guess who were the dissenters!

(Scalia, Rehnquist, Kennedy, and Thomas, for those who are not good at guessing.)

Anonymous at 11:09 AM

6.24.2005

Bored?

My friend Jay bought me a bunch of David & Goliath "Boys are Stupid" apparel for Christmas last year and I love it! So, when our friend Tom sent me a link to the Throw Rocks at Boys game, I knew I had to share it with our dear BOMT readers. Have fun, and let me know how many levels you make it through.

PS--isn't it a little ironic that it is only my male friends that are encouraging me to hate boys?

annamaria at 12:26 PM

And then he can apologize and resign.

Karl Rove can kiss my ass

This is what your glorious country thinks of your life

Speaking at a fund-raiser for the New York Conservative Party near the World Trade Center site in New York City, Rove said conservatives and liberals had differed over how to respond to the terrorists.

"Liberals saw the savagery of the 9/11 attacks and wanted to prepare indictments and offer therapy and understanding for our attackers," he said. "Conservatives saw the savagery of 9/11 and the attacks and prepared for war."

You sanctimonious piece of shit.

I wasn't in New York on 9/11, but three of my dearest friends were. And when I watched, helpless, while the news played footage of planes crashing and buildings crumbling and people dying, and I cried with a phone at each ear, trying desperately to contact my friends just to make sure that they were still alive, I can guarantee that the last thing on my mind was footing the therapy bill for the very people who had put them in danger.

I am so sick and fucking tired of people like Rove turning a national tragedy and a mass murder into some kind of political fodder, a tireless game of more-patriotic-than-thou. While my friends were stuck in subway trains trying to get back uptown, or in the streets unable to see through the dust and debris, Karl, your president was hopping from plane to plane, from bunker to bunker, trying to get his ass to anywhere but New York. Who are the cowards again?

And need I remind anyone that Conservatives prepared for the wrong war?

Shakespeare's Sister has more outrage, from a New Yorker's perspective.

annamaria at 10:26 AM

Friday Random Ten

I looked at the calendar today and realized that not only is it Friday (yes, I often forget what day it is), but I only have a week of work left before my wonderful two-week vacation. Other than a short trip to Chicago so that Jen and I can relive our Sloan groupie wonder years, I have absolutely no plans for my vacation. So, dear readers, in addition to your random ten lists I am soliciting suggestions for places to go, things to see, ways to waste time for two weeks that don't include sitting on my ass and watching Queer as Folk reruns.

Please keep in mind that money is an object, so jetting to Paris for a shopping spree is probably not an option.

Unless you're paying.

Bruised - The Bens
KC - Matt Pond PA
Tramp the Dirt Down - Elvis Costello
The Killing Moon - Echo & The Bunnymen
Blue You - The Magnetic Fields
Electric Avenue - Eddy Grant
Pleasant Valley Sunday - The Monkees
Smokestack Lightening (live) - Iron & Wine
Life's What You Make It - Talk Talk
Fourth of July - Galaxie 500

Your turn!

Labels: FRT

annamaria at 8:20 AM

6.23.2005

Scary Site of the Day: The Hal Turner Show

Seriously. This is some fucked up and crazy stuff. It's so hard for me to believe that people spewing with that much hate and intolerance are still out there -- but they are!

Here are a few choice quotes:

JURY SPLIT 6-6 IN KLANSMAN TRIAL!
Allegedly helped kill "Civil Rights Workers 41 years ago"

"Civil rights workers" my arse! They were troublemaking interlopers who drove to Mississippi to deliberately upset that state's way of life. They came looking for trouble and they found it. Now they're dead. GOOD!

Folk in Mississippi were RIGHT to kill those bastards. We should take a cue from the way Mississippi handled those troublemakers and re-implement that manner of handling things. Killing works! Violence solves everything!

And then...

FILTHY JEW HOMO COMMITTED 36,000 CHILD MOLESTATIONS
Evil Yid is the worst child molester in recorded history!

This degenerate jew, pig, beast should be seized from jail by an angry mob, LYNCHED from the nearest tree AND, just before he passes out from the hanging, his body should be set on fire.

In the mood to be pissed off and angry? I would recommend checking it out.

Anonymous at 10:41 AM

Welcome to the real world.

Being treated like a regular person sucks doesn't it?

It wasn't because you were black. It was because they didn't fucking care who you were.

Closed is closed is closed.

Anonymous at 10:39 AM

6.22.2005

One more reason to drink soy milk...

...assuming you don’t want kids, of course.

A plant chemical found in soya, tofu and legumes could potentially damage sperm and affect male fertility, a British researcher said on Wednesday.

Professor Lynn Fraser, of King's College London has shown that genistein, which can mimic the effect of the female hormone oestrogen, affects sperm in mice.

But it seems to have an even stronger impact on human sperm.

In laboratory tests, Fraser found that small amounts of the chemical can cause human sperm to "burn out" and lose fertility.

"Human sperm proved to be even more responsive than mouse sperm to genistein," Fraser told a fertility meeting.

Fascinating! Of course, I can’t help but think of my vegan brother and sister-in-law and their three children right now. None of them were planned. I don’t think they are having any fertility problems!

But, of course, no news about reproductive health and conception is complete without a stern warning to women. It seems that even if sperm is affected, it’s still all women’s fault:

She added that if women eat soya and other foods high in genistein it might have a bigger impact on male fertility because the chemical is likely to affect sperm when it is in the female preparing to fertilize an egg.

"Maternal exposure to the compounds is probably more important than paternal exposure," Fraser explained.

One more thing—isn’t soya is huge component of Chinese cuisine? 1.5 billion people; I don’t think they are having fertility problems either!

annamaria at 3:17 PM

I have quit smoking, after all...

Who wants to buy me an oh-so-fabulous present?

They are on sale, too. A deal.

Anonymous at 2:24 PM

Pussies and Assholes.

Pussy.

What happened to this Dick Durbin? Why does the administration turn any criticism into an attack on our troops?

Durbin had said Thursday that he had never brought U.S. soldiers into the comparison in the first place, and that he was criticizing the approved interrogation methods described in an FBI memo obtained through a Freedom of Information Act request.

He also based his comparison on an FBI report detailing conditions at Gitmo.

[A] detainee [was] chained hand and foot in a fetal position to the floor, with no chair, food or water. Most times they had urinated or defecated on themselves and had been left there for 18 to 24 hours or more. On one occasion, the air conditioning had been turned down so far and the temperature was so cold in the room that the barefooted detainee was shaking with cold.

So, instead of getting upset about the actual treatment of prisoners, we blow Durbin's comments out of proportion.

No, not Cristalino
Assholes

San Antonio Spurs for planning their victory parade prior to yesterday's game for Thursday -- the day of a potential game seven for the NBA championship.

Do you really want to piss off an opposing team, Pistons or otherwise? Announce that shit.

A sign on the greaseboard in Detroit's locker room read: "San Antonio's parade is scheduled for Thursday!!!"

San Antonio had four cases of Cristal sent into their locker room prior to the game (which isn't out of the ordinary, but do you have to have the opposing team see it? If you think it's going to psych them out, I think you are thinking of the wrong team.

Best quote about the circumstances? Rasheed Wallace, of course:

They had their Cristal ready and all that stuff, but -- hey, we're going to pop it on Thursday.

Anonymous at 11:51 AM

6.21.2005

Weddings and Heroin: A match made in heaven.

Since I've already made one music-based post today, I figured that I would continue today's trend.

While cruising through the soundtrack of my day that my iPod supplies, I came across Lou Reed's "Perfect Day." I always think that this song is terribly funny, as I'm sure so many people think it's the most romantic and lovely thing.

Oh it's such a perfect day, I'm glad I spent it with you.
Oh such a perfect day, you just keep me hanging on.
You just keep me hanging on.

Just a perfect day, problems all left alone,
Weekenders on our own, it's such fun.
Just a perfect day, you made me forget myself.
I thought I was someone else - someone good.

"Awww, Lou. I'm glad I spent this day with you, too," says the Heroin.

Says that what, what, what?

Yes, kids. All of you who had this song in your wedding, as your song, as you cut the cake, etc., he is not writing the song about this:

This is a very simple, straightforward, gentle song about a day spent with a lover. There is no mention of love or lust, nothing sentimental, just a description of the day and the sense that everything is so nice that Lou feels like a better person. I have felt that way with my husband and early in our relationship, it became our song (of course, we have a few our songs). We played this song as we cut our wedding cake.

The person in the song doesn't love a person; he loves a drug. Granted, on this day the heroin made him feel so good that he felt like a better person. At the time. So I guess she was sort of right?

This is only one of the many songs that are misinterpreted as being sugary and sweet. I know of a crapload - like the La's "There She Goes," since remade (horribly) by that Sixpence None the Richer Band, and featured in both versions in many movies and television commercials.

Like the Ortho Tri-Cyclen LO birth control commercials -- where all the ladies are not skipping around, excited from their latest high.

Let's play the "List All the Songs About Heroin That You Know" game. Who is next?

Anonymous at 6:03 PM

Billy Corgan is out of his bald-ass mind.

After taking out a full page ad in today's Chicago Tribune, you have to wonder if Corgan is just full of himself or completely dedicated to the world of rock 'n roll.

You decide.

In other news, though, he seems to want to get the Smashing Pumpkins going again. I just wonder what they would sound like after all these years (okay, five). Dated? Groundbreaking? Should they have remained broken up? Will they kick ass? Are the other members even interested?

I, for one, was a fan of the Smashing Pumpkins. I had this shirt that I wore and wore and wore until it was the most comfortable thing and a stunning shade of faded grey (in contrast to its original state -- rigid and black).

Someone stole that shirt, and it still makes me sad.

Anonymous at 1:36 PM

6.20.2005

If Blue States Secede

Via Tennessee Guerilla Women:

Dear Red States,

We're ticked off at the way you've treated California, and we've decided we're leaving.

We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast.

We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

Read More

I would like to amend this statement of intents by indicating that we will trade Grand Rapids for Austin, because any place that gave us Bill Hicks is good in my book. Maybe we’ll take Dallas, too, but only if BOMT regular Kurt doesn’t enlist in our emergency relocation program.

annamaria at 11:01 AM

QAF 506: Who's Hot, Who's Not?

Welcome to QAF 506, a world of tidy resolutions and barely any Brian and Justin screentime. Gee, how do you think I felt about this episode?

So, Lindsay, Melanie and Michael have inexplicably kissed and made up. Ben and Michael invite everyone over for the world’s most boring housewarming party—Mel and JR show up and Michael proceeds to show everyone what a cute wittle baby she is. Mel & Linds bond over punch, reminiscing about their own housewarming party a lifetime ago. Awww…isn’t this a beautiful picture of a wonderful, happy, non-traditional family? Give me a fucking break. Excuse me, but, um, weren’t y’all trying to kill each other just last week?

A few weeks ago, I discussed Rule #1 in QAF-land: never, ever throw a surprise party. This week illustrates Rule #2—Ted is the Anti-Brian. But wait! Apparently, the world has shifted on its axis and Rule #2 has been subverted—Brian is the Anti-Ted!

So, while Ted is getting laid left and right (due to plastic surgery that didn’t change his appearance one iota), and exacting his revenge on Troy for the whole Mr. Pride Pity Fuck 2002 embarrassment, Brian can’t even manage to do better than a lackluster, half-finished blowjob on a hi-lo (did anyone else find the construction-site motif at the sex party a little too Village People for their liking?). Wherefore art thou, Brian’s stud reputation? Well, it seems the patrons of Babylon have found a new king; enter…He Who Shall Remain Nameless Because the Writers Didn’t Bother to Tell Us His Name. We’ll call him Brandon. (***Spoiler Alert*** His name actually is Brandon).

Oh, poor Brian. Soon Brandon is rejecting our hero and getting all the good tricks while Brian finds himself in the unenviable position of coming home to the same supremely hot blonde boy ass every night. However will he survive? I know, I know, I’m treading dangerously close to having my status as the president of the Straight Girls for Brian Kinney Fanclub revoked, but seriously, he needs to grow up! I’m not arguing for a life of monogamy, but is being the hottest fag in Pittsburgh the only thing he’s got going? For an egotistical bastard, Brian doesn’t seem to have much faith in his own self-worth, does he?

Justin meanwhile does grow up and tells Brian what he wants out of their relationship—meaning, he wants an actual relationship. Well, it’s about time! By the way, I loved this scene, with Justin talking and Brian trying on about 20 of the same black shirt. In my more poetic moments, I would say that the black shirt represents the nameless tricks—virtually indistinguishable from one another, and easily cast aside. But I have been known to read way too much into things!

As an aside, this Brandon guy? Not hot. And I know it’s going to be difficult to cast a role with an actor that is meant to rival the yummy Gale Harold, but certainly Showtime could have done better than a short guy with stringy, dirty-blonde hair. He looks like an 80s catalog model. Whew…I think I just secured my spot as fanclub president for at least another week!

hot

So, what’s up with the characters that aren’t Brian?

Emmett—tries to sex up his Queer Guy spot on the evening news, only to be told to keep his dirty laundry off the airwaves.

Debbie—suffering from BFM, she finally tells Carl that she misses the diner, and she gives up the life of a Lady of Leisure to sling hash. Good for her!

Hunter—skips school by claiming to be at debate practice (which makes sense, because only total losers like Jen and I were on the debate team), and finally admits that school is unbearable now that everyone knows his HIV status. In a stunning display of the Worst Parenting Ever, Ben and Michael let Hunter run away, but not without first giving him money.

Rage & JT—get married! Yeah, keep dreaming Justin.

Overall, not a terrible episode, but still too neat and tidy for my liking. Give me some actual drama, people!

Labels: QAF

annamaria at 8:15 AM

6.17.2005

Friday Random Ten

I'll have to own up and admit that this week's random ten isn't completely random. I did put the mp3 player on shuffle, but because I wanted to make this a special edition, I had to skip through a few tracks...please forgive me. And don't tell Lauren. Hopefully you will approve of my methods when I introduce the Friday Random Ten, Fully Downloadable Edition! Now, for the first time, you can actually listen with me! Isn't that exciting?

Coin-Operated Boy - The Dresden Dolls
Not If You Were the Last Junkie on Earth - The Dandy Warhols
My English Teacher is a Mogwai Fan - Moonkat
List of Demands (Reparations) - Saul Williams
Waltz of the Noctambulist - Metrovavan
Step Into My Office, Baby - Belle & Sebastian
Jerusalem - Mirah
I'd Rather Dance With You - Kings of Convenience
Cripple and the Starfish - Antony & The Johnsons
Mistakes and Regrets - ...And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead

Who's next?

Labels: FRT

annamaria at 9:02 AM

5 spoke

6.16.2005

Do you have this album yet?

The Decemberists present "Piacaresque"

No? Then stop reading right now and buy it. Honestly. I got it this weekend because I couldn’t get 16 Military Wives out of my head, and I couldn’t find a decent mp3 anywhere. So I need to say to all you bastards that uploaded shitty copies of this song—thank you! This is by far the best album I’ve purchased this year.

My favorite songwriters don’t just write three-minutes of rhymes, they weave tales of ordinary lives made important by the mere fact that we are listening. Jimmy Webb made me care about a county lineman, Johnny Cash made me laugh at the antics of a boy named Sue, and now Colin Meloy makes me cry about poor, heartbroken Eli, the barrow boy. Meloy nails it when proclaims himself “a writer, a writer of fictions" in The Engine Driver (which, incidentally, alludes to Webb’s Wichita Lineman)—these aren’t mere pop songs, they are mini-epics that would make Kurt Weill proud.

I'm serious, if you haven't already, check it out. Here are few songs to whet your appetite:

The Soldiering Life

The Engine Driver

annamaria at 3:27 PM

And now for your “Well, that’s fucking obvious!” news of the day…

Being gay is in the genes, say researchers:

Being gay is nothing to do with your relationship with your mother, your father, or your best friend at boarding school; it is all in the genes, according to the scientific authors of a new book on the subject.

Born Gay: The Psychobiology of Sexual Orientation, by Qazi Rahman, a psychobiologist at the University of East London, and Glenn Wilson, a personality specialist from the University of London, reviews research from the last 15 years into why people are gay.

[…]

The researchers examined evidence from the fields of psychology, neuroscience, genetics, endocrinology and evolutionary biology, and concluded that sexual orientation is determined by a combination of genetics and hormonal activity in the womb - and that upbringing, childhood experience and personal choice have little or no influence.

They argue that the 2% to 4% of people in the population who are gay are born that way, and this proportion does not seem to vary across societies. While men tend to be either heterosexual or homosexual, with little evidence for true bisexuality, women show more mixed preferences.

So, can we stop with the ex-gay ministries and rehabilitation clinics now? There is a reason they don’t work people! I can’t make you straight anymore than you can make me produce sperm. And while society might deem it preferable that I produce sperm (women are approaching 55% of the human population—you guys could use some help!), there is no amount of psychological indoctrination that is going to change my reproductive system. I was born this way. Sorry.

Oh, and for Angry Republican Mom—you want another reason why gay men and women hate Republicans, you got one:

"I would rather you commit suicide than have you leave Love In Action wanting to return to the gay lifestyle. In a physical death you could still have a spiritual resurrection; whereas, returning to homosexuality you are yielding yourself to a spiritual death from which there is no recovery."
--The Final Indoctrination from John Smid, Director, Love In Action

Labels: LGBT

annamaria at 2:49 PM

Site of the Day: Angry Republican Mom

Angry Republican Mom was actually submitted by BOMT regular Kurt.

...there is another blog I read that has asked for reasons why gays hate Bush. Now, not being qualified to answer this, I gave her some comments from a liberal's point of view. I thought that you and some of your other readers could perhaps explain the basis of the feelings.

Please be kind and don't just flame the poor woman.

So kids, let's play nice and teach the Republican mom that not all liberals are head nodders, and that we all hate Bush for very different and acceptable reasons.

P.S. - Not to be a catty bitch, but I think her hobbies listed in her profile are terribly funny. Keep in mind that this woman is 25, and not the 58 that her hobbies portray her as.

harp, gardening, reading, dragons, Victoriana, Victorian Homes, old homes, remodeling, restoration, pre-raphaelite art

Anonymous at 12:04 PM

6.14.2005

The not-so-happy place on earth.

A 4-year-old boy died on a ride at Walt Disney World's Epcot Center.

He died at Celebration Hospital -- what a kick in the balls that must have been. To even see it listed that way in the article is a little disturbing.

Paramedics tried to revive him, but he died at Celebration Hospital.

Something tells me that Celebration Hospital is not the best name for such a place.

Anyway, anyway. I would just like to point out that this is the ride I almost passed out on last month. I didn't really know what was happening, but I knew I was going to pass out, so I just started grabbing the vomit bags they have in front of you. You know... "just in case." I figured that if I did pass out, and if I came out of it and the ride was still going, I would throw up for sure. Bad news bears.

So, yeah. I feel bad. For the family. For the kid.

That ride's a motherfucker.

Anonymous at 3:27 PM

Annamaria's tips for proper gas station etiquette

I get hit on at gas stations. I don’t know why the sight of me at the gas pumps is seemingly so irresistible to men, but I appear to be at my cutest when my car is on E. Usually, a polite nod before turning my back and going about my business is enough to get these guys to back off and realize that I’m not looking for love at the BP. Occasionally, it takes a little more effort; for example, the other day I turned into the gas station just as a man was exiting his car, holding a map in his left hand while flagging me down with his right. I assumed he needed directions, and being the friendly and helpful girl that I am, I stopped to assist him. This was a mistake. Our conversation went like this:

while CG is speaking, he manages to put his hands on my car door, so that his fingers are over the open window, and slightly

inside

my car

trying to figure out how to drive off without running over CG’s feet

Thanking every known deity for the fact that my claddagh only fits on my left hand

sotto voce

Driving off and deciding that the gas station across the street, despite being $0.02 more per gallon is the better deal

I know its a common myth that feminists hate being hit on. I can't speak for all of my sisters, but honestly, I don't mind it. It's flattering, and sometimes a smile from a cute guy is enough to make me happy for hours. But Creepy Guy...yeah, that's not flirting, nor is it flattering--it's just creepy. You see, walking up to a woman and invading her personal space (did I mention that his hands were inside my car??) in order to do your good deed for the day might seem like a good idea to you, Creepy Guy, but to me it seems like a good reason to start rethinking bans on mace and pepper spray.

So, here's my good deed for the day. Guys: if you spot a cutie at the Amoco, smile at her. See if she smiles back. Now, actually think about her smile--is it a smirk, as in "Would you look at that moron trying to pick me up at the gas station"? If so, do not approach said cutie. If it is a genuine smile, ask her a polite question, as in "How are you doing today?" In short, be interested in her, and she might become interested in you. But do not, under any circumstances, put your hands in her car!

annamaria at 2:35 PM

6.13.2005

Ding! Ding! Ding! Survey says...

Jackson jurors are ready to spill. The verdict will be read at 1:30 p.m. (that's 4:30 for you East Coasters and 3:30 for the Chicago folk.)

Do you think that MJ will have to go to the emergency room again on the way to the courthouse? I'm taking bets.

Handy little tabulation chart, thanks to CNN:

[Edited to reflect the fact that crazyface got off on all charges. Opinions?]

Anonymous at 4:08 PM

QAF 505: Seriously. That’s it?

Yawn. I'm just glad that damn custody battle is resolved. I couldn't stand one more second of it. I thought they might start dividing poor JR into actual thirds.

My I-Want-to-Kill-Mel Moment:
Since when did hiring a babysitter to go to a PTA meeting turn into child abandonment? And first assuming that they skipped out on baby duty to go to Babylon, and then saying that she didn't give a crap about their son when she found that they were at a school meeting for him? Skankbag.

And Ted? How pissed would I be at my plastic surgeon? All he did was pull the pillow out from under his shirt and tell him to turn his frown upside down. Oh. And apparently gave him an eyelash curler and a little bit of mascara.

"Ted, you look fabulous."

That pained look while he tried to give Ted a compliment is exactly why I love Brian. That ass can really crack me up.

Speaking of Brian, though, I feel like he's really getting shit on right about now. He's getting pressured into domesticity by every person around him, whether it is the Boring and Stodgy Ave. crew, Justin, babies, whatever.

Michael blows him off (not in a good way) for the party planned in his honor. Invites him to a dinner party where he should have known that he would not fit in and leaves him to be insulted by Agnes and Edith (aka Stodgy and Boring Ave. friends).

And then there's Justin. He's starting to get on my nerves as well. Fucked his brains out in Hollywood, comes back to Pittsburg to join Brian in a couple's foursome just last episode, and now he's drawing syphilis on Rage's face and sulking because he would like to mimic Novotny's bullshit Suzie homemaker routine. Garbage.

Three cheers for Hunter, though, for telling the parents what fascist assholes they are. But just when he thinks that things are going well and he starts to trust Callie again, she crushes his soul by going to the mall with hunky not-at-all-like-Hunter guy.

Things I don't believe: That Brian has never contracted an STD; That Debbie had no idea Loretta was hitting on her; That Debbie has apparently never been hit on by the ladies, even though she frequents the gay bars; That QAF cops out again by not letting the Loretta storyline play out because of some story equating Debbie to shrimp. Come on. Why is everything such a quick solution? Such a clean break?

And then, there's Daphne. My sweet Daphne. Where in the hell has she been? I love that girl and she only makes a :20 cameo each season.

In good news, though, Showtime is actually starting to auction off things that I would actually give a shit about. No more pairs of Brian's Seven jeans. No more shirts. I want memorabilia. I want the real deal. I want things from the Liberty Diner! And, finally, my prayers have been answered this week with the listing of the big menu and diner sign. Love it.

But speaking about the ultra queer, check out Brian's shirt that is up for auction this week.

Check out this week’s auctions here. And feel free to buy me something.

Labels: QAF

Anonymous at 3:44 PM

Lynching sucks: Is it necessary to express it in a Senate resolution?

Today the Senate is scheduled to take up the very controversial subject of lynching. Supporters and criticizers of this resolution will certainly be present, expressing their views on the Senate apology for not acting to outlaw the practice.

Wait? Did I say supporters and criticizers?

That right, because no one openly supports lynching anymore. Unless you belong to the KKK, in which case you are a racist piece of shit and probably shouldn't be reading my blog. Because I hate you.

So, what's the point?

Yeah, I said it. What's the point?

I do grant the fact that an estimated 4,700 people (which I'm sure is much higher) were murdered in this fashion between 1882 and 1968. It sickens me. It disgusts me.

So why don't I care about this resolution?

It does nothing. Nonbinding resolutions are just that -- nonbinding. It would be like the Senate passing a law saying it was sorry that its members speed on their way to work. While I'm happy that they admit their wrongs, what does it do to serve us now, other than generate positive press for something that people today think is a nonissue (nonissue meaning that it is not terror or Brit and Kevin on Chaotic)?

If Emmett Till's family doesn't get anything from it, who cares? His murders still escaped justice. Then sold their story to Look for $4000. Awesome.

I just feel that instead of wasting time on a nonbinding resolution, do something about it. Go to surviving family members. Hear their stories. See the photographs. Say you’re sorry. Fucking mean it.

Or else spend my money working on policy that is actually going to accomplish something. Because while you Senators may have warm fuzzies from your symbolic action, I see it as nothing.

Anonymous at 3:04 PM

6.10.2005

Widow for a month.

I will effectively be widow in late November/early December, as my spouse will be spending a month in Hawaii for school.

Bitch. But I guess I still love him. As long as he brings me back something pretty.

(Here's your hint, Ian - bring me back something pretty.)

So, I think I'm going to plan my own outing. Anyone up for a quick jaunt to some non-hurricaney warm place?

Are the hurricanes done by November? I'm not a meteorologist and I don't live where hurricanes frequent, so I have no idea what weather is like anywhere other than where I live.

Anyone game?

Or will anyone at least come and visit me when I'm all by myself?

(No killers/rapists from the Internet, please.)

Anonymous at 3:38 PM

No Sharp Objects

Perhaps this isn't the best idea, since both Kerri and I recently quit therapy, but Rich just sent me this article from the Guardian, listing the 25 most depressing songs ever. Great, just what I need! Here are the highlights (lowlights?):

25. Sam Stone John Prine (1972)
A grim song about a strung-out former soldier that remains a favourite of audiences who prefer their Vietnam vets to be total losers. Over finger-picked guitar, Prine sings about Sam Stone, a drug-addicted veteran who injects morphine and neglects his impoverished family before overdosing in a decrepit room "that smelled like death". Sam Stone is basically a composite for Hollywood's ideal Vietnam veteran: an hallucinating psycho with a Fu Manchu moustache who goes barking mad every time a Doors song comes on the radio.

Might I also suggest the Laura Cantrell version of this song, which manages to be as beautiful as it is heartbreaking.

14. Comfortably Numb Pink Floyd (1979)
This classic rock dirge appears on Pink Floyd's notorious magnum opus The Wall, the one album you can never listen to in its entirety unless you own a bong the size of a mop. In Comfortably Numb, bassist/grump Roger Waters plays the unctuous doctor who medicates tortured rock star Pink voiced by guitarist/better singer David Gilmour. Disturbing references to pricking needles and hallucinatory ships abound, with Waters singing like a demented Peter Lorre. A great pile-driver guitar solo by Gilmour at the end prevents us from wanting to bury ourselves alive.

I point only because the mere mention of Pink Floyd depresses me. Sorry, I know there's this whole subculture of Floyd-LSD-Laser Light shows, but for the life of me, I just don't understand the appeal. I'll take the Scissor Sisters version of this song any day!

13. Brick Ben Folds Five (1997)
(NB: Many listeners, including me, first assumed Brick was about a relationship ending. We discovered later that it's about a couple getting an abortion. The following is based on the first scenario. Therefore it's all wrong.) A gloomy piano-and-voice song about a couple breaking up (wrong), Brick tells of a guy who picks up his girlfriend, bitches, takes her someplace, bitches, waits for her, bitches, then brings her back home, referring to her as a "brick" (this is true). We never learn what's transpired in between (this is wrong). All that's certain is the couple wants to split up (this is wrong). Brick offers the same pleasure that comes with dropping one on your foot (this is really true).

As the author notes, he got it all wrong. This is (supposedly) the true story of a young Ben Folds taking his girlfriend to get an abortion, and to this day makes me cry. Want more depressing Ben Folds? Check out "Magic" from The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold Messner. If you listen to that song without shedding a tear, you are a heartless bastard.

7. Strange Fruit Billie Holiday (1939)
Strange indeed and insufferable, too. This notorious anti-lynching song unfortunately helped cement Billie Holiday's reputation as a wounded torch singer, gardenia optional. Musically tedious, Strange Fruit is outfitted with grotesque lyrics ("bulging eyes", "twisted mouth", "burning flesh") which exploit the horrors of lynching more than they condemn it. Holiday began her career as a superb interpreter of swinging pop songs but eventually succumbed to the melodramatics of songs like this. While some Holiday acolytes feel that no vocalists are worthy enough to cover the song, it's really the other way round. It's impossible for anyone to sing Strange Fruit without sounding like an agitprop fanatic.

How is this not number one? I was pretty cool with the list until right now. Insufferable? I have a feeling that Brits are so emotionally repressed (sorry Rich!) that hearing Billie's heartbreakingly tortured account of a lynching offends their stiff-upper-lip stoicism. Or maybe it's just another example of the infamous British "Mustn't Grumble" mentality!

1. The Christmas Shoes Newsong (2000)
Never heard of it? Well, you should. This serotonin-draining Yuletide song, based on an apocryphal story passed around the internet, hit no 1 on the adult contemporary charts in the US while spawning a best- selling novella and a top-rated TV movie. It tells of a disgruntled holiday shopper who encounters a lone dishevelled little boy trying to buy a pair of shoes for his dying mother. The lad doesn't have enough money and pleads with the man to help so mummy can look good when she "meets Jesus tonight". The man's Grinch facade melts and he chips in some cash. The little boy runs out of the store by himself while the guy thanks God for reminding him about the true spirit of Christmas. Following this logic, then, Christmas is about afflicting a boy's mother with a terminal disease so a self-absorbed moron can feel good about giving a few quid to an unaccompanied seven-year-old. The Christmas Shoes is smug, saccharine and more depressing than the Cure's entire career. And because it's Christmas-themed and we have to hear it year after year in the US, it gets my vote as the most depressing song ever. Download at your own peril.

WHAT? No, this isn't depressing, it's fucking cloying and terrible! I demand a re-count; the only thing depressing about this song is that anyone bothered to record it in the first place!

I'm also disappointed that one of my favorite depressing songs didn't make the cut. Check out Borderline by Chris Mills, and see if you can make it through the entire song without eyeing any sharp objects.

And feel free to suggest more depressing songs for our dear readers to check out. Just not too depressing, okay? Wouldn't do to kill the readership off!

annamaria at 12:55 PM

Blog of Note, Vol. 1

I'm going to start posting some of the funny/sad/interesting/scary/infuriating blogs that I regularly visit.

This one is one of my favorites, which a good friend passed along to me. PostSecret "is an ongoing community art project where people mail in their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard."

Frank Warren, owner of PostSecret, was reminded of one of his own secrets that he had hidden from himself -- an incident of childhood humiliation:

From a memory that felt fresh, I chose my words carefully and composed my first PostSecret. The next day, I wrote my address on the postcard, walked to the post office, and physically "let it go" into a mailbox. It was liberating: sometimes we believe we are keeping a secret, but it can be just as true that the secret is keeping us.

The owner of this web site has received over 2000 confessions. A book containing some of the postcards will be published early next year.

I'm going to send him my dark shameful secret that I have never told anyone.

Not a living soul.

And no one will ever know. Except for the guy at the PostSecret.

Haunts me to this day. Hopefully when I drop it in the mailbox I too will be liberated.

You can send your secret on a homemade postcard to:
PostSecret
13345 Copper Ridge Rd.
Germantown, MD 20874-3454

Anonymous at 11:26 AM

Friday Random Ten

Well, after two very special Friday Random Tens, it's back to a boring old "Annamaria hates her job so much it makes her want to cry" edition. Hopefully, next week will be the "Annamaria sent her resume to Jen, who promptly found her a fabulous new job in Chicago" edition. Much as I love Detroit (as evidenced by the two Detroit artists on this week's list), if I don't get out of here soon, I'm going to slit my wrists. And you know how much I hate undignified displays of emotion like that. Anyway, enough of my bitching, you all know the rules, and I know you've been waiting all week for this.

Insects Rule - Brendan Benson
Cry to Me - Solomon Burke
Me, Myself and I - De La Soul
Revolution Rock - The Clash
My Baby Loves the Secret Agent - Detroit Cobras
Girl Anachronism - Dresden Dolls
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road - Elton John
Feel the Pain - Dinosaur Jr.
I'm Still Drinking In My Dreams - Mike Doughty
Our House - Madness

Damn, I just realized that all of these titles pretty much describe how I am feeling at this very moment...well, except for the Detroit Cobras song, because I don't think Rich has a thing for CIA chicks.

That said, it's all you, baby, show me what you got!

Labels: FRT

annamaria at 7:59 AM

6.07.2005

I don't even know where to start.

This story, believe it or not, actually makes me so furious that I don't know what to say.

Apparently the Pope isn't going to prance around the gay subject when he discusses it, lightly condemning it or giving it a shame-shame hand gesture.

No, no.

He's going to say some things that are so outlandish that it makes the condemnation actually hilarious (to those who aren't on the Conservative Left, drooling as they reply "yesssss masssster" to his decree).

To the point: Pope Benedict condemned same-sex marriage as fake and as expressions of "anarchic freedom" that puts the family in danger.

Which family is this? Is it like THE family? Like some kind of mobster or gangster family? I can just see Don Vito Corleone whispering, "It's putting the family in danger. It must be taken care of."

Or maybe it's just a conversation that happens over at Annamaria's house.

But the Pope continues! Not only are the gays threatening the world, but divorce, artificial birth control, trial marriages, free-style unions? Condemned. Condemned. Condemned. Condemned.

In a clear reference to contraception, the Pope said couples went against the nature of love itself when they "systematically shut off" the possibility of "the gift of life."

The nature of love itself? Apparently the nature of love wants you to have a bazillion babies. Is the Pope going to help pay for my billion babies? Or is the Catholic Church?

That's what I thought.

You can read global reactions to this global-sized douche here.

Labels: LGBT

Anonymous at 6:11 PM

5 spoke

6.06.2005

Well, I guess that's one way to quit smoking...

I like smoking. A lot.

But, unfortunately, I am broke. I will be broke until next Wednesday. Anyone want to Paypal me some dollars so I can buy some noodles?

At any rate, first thing to go: cigarettes.

I'm taking this opportunity to quit smoking. Again.

I guess that, even though I really like it, there are some good things associated with quitting smoking. I won't get bronchitis every winter. My lungs won't look like (or as much like) the smoker lungs from the Body Worlds exhibit.

But, whatever. I'm still pissed about it.

Anonymous at 1:20 PM

9 spoke

QAF 504: You can’t always get what you want?

There are a couple of things that hold universally true in the world of Queer as Folk; chief among them is this: never, EVER, throw a party for someone unless you want your relationship with them to be forever changed. Throw some men dressed as superheroes into the mix, and kiss your relationship goodbye. Remember Mikey’s surprise 30th birthday party, Brian? How about the Rage launch? So, Brian thinks the best way to divest Michael of this silly notion of monogamy is to parade hot guys in tight spandex around Babylon, and little Mikey will see the error of his ways. Well, that might work for you and me, Mr. Kinney, but Michael’s a different story.

Brian asks 'Wherefore art thou, Mikey?'

Predictably, the episode opens with thumping music and sweaty, writhing bodies. But wait! There are four sweaty, writhing bodies—it’s Brian and Justin Date Night! Damn, it’s been a while since we’ve seen one of those. Post-coital conversation centers around Brian and Justin’s new friends, whose ten-year relationship is governed by the axiom "the couple who plays together, stays together." Brian looks convinced, Justin unimpressed.

Surprise, surprise, Justin is later seen looking rather domestic, with a baby blanket over his shoulder cuddling little JR. Awww. It’s too bad we all know that he’ll never have one of his own as long as he stays with Brian. Suddenly, in comes Lindsay who proceeds to fight with Melanie over the custody agreement, ruining our happy little domestic scene—could the writers be more heavy-handed? Justin obviously wants love, romance, family, stability, but all around him families are falling apart. What’s a boy to do?

I’ll tell you what—cut to the scene with Brian and Justin in the shower. Justin realizes that despite its unconventional nature, at nearly five years he and Brian are now party to Liberty Avenue’s longest lasting relationship. Even Brian realizes it, telling Justin that while their married friends are either busting up or losing themselves in a wave of boring domesticity, the two of them will be saved. Did you catch Brian calling Justin “Mon Amour?” So close, but not quite there. You need to say it in English, Brian!

The dinner party at Ben and Michael’s is an unmitigated disaster—shocking! Brian stays true to form, Ben tries to maintain a Zen-like atmosphere, Monty and Eli jockey for the coveted “Most Pretentious Queer” title, Michael pouts and Justin looks like he can’t decide if he wants to laugh or cry. Although, when Brian presented the newlyweds with a sling for the playroom, I think Justin managed a slight chuckle.

Loretta is the new Debbie, making the old Debbie feel, well, old. Much QVCing ensues. And while I never, ever want to see anyone on QAF wield a bat ever again, seeing Debbie defend Loretta against her abusive husband was truly a sight to behold. Poor Darryl nearly learned the hard way what happens when you say the word fag in a diner full of bears.

So, this time Debbie’s got the bat, but poor Hunter is about to find out that high school hasn’t changed much since Justin dealt with Chris Hobbs. Everyone finds out about his HIV status, and the little-hustler-that-could finds himself ostracized from all of his friends, and pitied by his ex-girlfriend. I should have known that the second Ben and Michael took notice of their other child, all hell would break loose.

I am officially bored with the custody plotline—NEXT! Seriously. Previews for next week show JR at the hospital with Melanie and Michael arguing about who gets to take her in. Um…didn’t we do this four seasons ago with Gus? Yeah, we get it, gays and lesbians get fucked over at hospitals. I seriously doubt anyone watching a gay drama hasn’t learned this by now.

Oh, and one more thing about the previews for 505—Brian gets an STD. Okay, are we seriously supposed to believe that this is the first time this has happened? The man has spent the past five years nailing everything that wasn’t already nailed down. Are the writers now making a case for monogamy after thoroughly trashing it in 504? Say it ain’t so!

Labels: QAF

annamaria at 9:59 AM

6.03.2005

QAF 503: I thought only Mexican parents wrapped their strollers in plastic?

Stereotypical, sure. But if you lived in Chicago you would know what I mean. Doesn’t matter the temperature or the weather, but all Mexican parents have the little plastic cover for their stroller on – all the time. Like Lindz in QAF episode 503.

So, I have finally gotten around to writing this episode’s recap and criticism. I figured that I had better do it either before Annamaria kicked my ass or the next episode aired. I have finals right now, though, so you must forgive me.

So, here’s what happened, in a nutshell. Brian and Michael are growing further apart. (Yay! Does this mean that we’ll see less of the ever-morphing Mikey?)

Brian, despite his being successful on all other levels can’t seem to get more than 11 boys to show at Babylon. How is it that he can get a packed house for Justin’s launch of Rage at the same club, but can’t get more than 11 people to come to his club, regardless of his supposed marketing genius? Shitty story line, but Justin comes to the rescue and helps save the day.

My and Annamaria’s favorite Brian/Justin exchange:
Brian: Sunshine, how did I ever get along without you?
Justin: You didn’t.

Aw! My heart is a-burstin from all the Brian/Justin love, but then there’s all the other bullshit that no one cares about from the episode. For example:

Mikey and Ben get their new place on Stodgy and Boring Ave. and proceed to be – you guessed it – stodgy and boring.

Mel and Mikey’s custody battle heats up! And crash, boom, surprise! Guess who ends up being the biggest and baddest of the bitches? Fucking Lindsay, who takes Brian’s advice (and lawyer) and kicks the shit out of everyone. I mean, good for her for having some balls and not letting Mel handle things for once.

And the whole “trust me, I’ll take care of things” from Mel? If she wasn’t involved in any legal decision she would have no rights going forward if Mel decided to be a bitch – and that’s not a stretch to imagine.

Emmett fails miserably at being Queer Guy by talking about nose hairs? Something tells me that he would have practiced this segment in front of one of his friends, who (hopefully) would have immediately told him that he needed to let his flame burn a teeny tiny bit brighter than…nose hairs.

And then blah, blah, blah. Debbie retires from the diner to spend more time with Horvath. Were Annamaria and I the only ones to realize that Debbie is not that old? And what is she going to do well the man is at work? Something tells me that Debbie isn’t going to make the best domestic.

After rewatching the first two episodes, as well as this one, I have to admit that I’m getting into QAF again. Granted, if shit goes awry and some things happen throughout the season that a little birdie told me about I’ll be pissed.

Let’s just say that the writers may force things to wrap up with a big shiny happy bow, and that’s just not the way shit works (or how I want it to work, at least).

Labels: QAF

Anonymous at 11:08 AM

A post in which I will refrain from any reference to Fight Club

Jen and I attended the Body Worlds exhibit at the Museum of Science and Industry this past weekend and were awed by the embryo and fetus room—mostly because it was heavily guarded due to the theft of a 13-week-old plastinated fetus from the exhibit’s stint at the California Science Center last March. However, I don’t think Jen and I were amazed by the embryos for quite the same reasons as most people; we both looked at them and said "this is what all the fuss is about?" These little specks of life, while miraculous to the parents who so desperately want them, just don’t ignite in me the same passion—I don’t see them and think "Hey look! It’s Little Future-Timmy!" Instead, I see blastocysts that could be used to make sure that Little Present-Timmy with juvenile diabetes lives a long and healthy life.

So, when I read about the Snowflakes program over at Pandagon, I just got pissed off. You see, the "Snowflakes" are the little frozen babies that are the result of in vitro fertilization, and the program aims to place these excess babies with new parents, since their bio-parents so callously left them in a freezer. Yeah, it’s great that infertile couples can adopt unwanted frozen embryos—but what if those are my unwanted embryos? What if I don’t want to breed for other people, but would rather that my unused embryos be used for science, be it for Gunther von Hagens’s exhibition or embryonic stem cell research? To be able to give another person a child may be a gift, but not one that should be extracted by force.

And I wonder what the end result would be if we continue along the line of thought that every instance of biological (human) life is precious and should be saved at all cost? Certainly we don’t feel that way about soldiers, but that’s a conversation for another day. If these little congregations of cells are people, endowed with as many (if not more) rights as their parents, what, as Jesse asks, are their names? When are their birthdays? Are they T-minus nine months old? Do we change the laws so that you can claim tax exemptions for all the little embryos you have frozen in some cryogenic tank? And where does it stop? Funeral rituals for my every menstrual cycle—after all, that could have been a baby if I had just done my duty and fucked! Of course, I’m not married, so that’s a sin too. Ah, the illogic.

So, in a bit I’m going to head out and see Jay and Alison’s baby, and I know without a doubt that when I do, I will marvel at this little person and love him without reservation. But Jay has Type I diabetes, and there is a risk that little Ben might someday have it too. I dare anyone to tell me that Jay and Ben’s lives and health are to be sacrificed so that some little snowflake can be born.

annamaria at 9:58 AM

Friday Random Ten

It's another special edition of Friday Random Ten--today, it's the "Welcome to the world Benjamin Ryan" edition. My friend Alison went into labor late last night, and I'm going to be skipping out of work in a bit to see the newest member of our little family. So, while I'm hanging out with the baby, please feel free to play in my absence. Rules are here.

Apart - Elkland
Love is the Drug - Roxy Music
Don't Be A Dick - Panthers
I Wish I Had an Evil Twin - The Magnetic Fields
Rise - P.I.L.
Lovers in the Backseat - Scissor Sisters
Brighter Than Sunshine - Aqualung
16 Military Wives - The Decemberists
Witchita Lineman - Johnny Cash
40 Grand in the Hole - Mike Doughty

I promise some baby blogging when I get pictures developed!

Labels: FRT

annamaria at 7:42 AM

6.02.2005

What would Jesus drive? Not a Ford, that's for damn sure!

I was planning a brilliantly snarky response to the American Family Association’s planned boycott of Ford, but Brad at Sadly, No! not only beat me to it, he managed to be far more brilliant and snarky than I could ever hope to be. Damn him.

As If We Only Think About Cars

Jen and I had a conversation this weekend about boycotts (or, as One Angry Girl calls them, girlcotts), and agreed that they are generally ineffective. After all, my personal refusal to shop at Wal-Mart will hardly bring down the world’s largest corporation. But that doesn’t mean they should get my money. So, I coined the term "Ethical Consumerism" to describe my personal boycotts. I don’t shop at Wal-Mart or buy Nestle products because to do so, for me, would be unethical. So, I guess for that reason I’m not too upset by the AFA’s boycott of Ford*—every consumer has the right to refuse to purchase from any company, if their business practices violate their personal ethics. But I really doubt that it will work given that the AFA’s subscriber base is undoubtedly comprised of Patriotic, Buy-American, good ol’ boys, I can’t imagine that they will suddenly start buying Toyotas and Hondas in an attempt to bring fag-loving Ford down.

The truth is Ford’s support of the gay community isn’t done out of altruistic sense of justice—it’s a business decision. Offering domestic partnership benefits to employees makes good business sense; it reminds employees that the company respects their families, and encourages gay applicants to pick Ford over another potential employer that may not offer partner benefits. It’s the same reason that Ford, GM and DaimlerChrysler all submitted amicus briefs in favor of the University of Michigan’s affirmative action policies—companies are more successful when they have a diverse talent pool to draw from. And advertising in gay magazines is merely an attempt to tap into a major market—millions of queers with billions of dollars (to steal a line from Brian Kinney). And virtually every major corporation (with the notable exception of Wal-Mart) agrees with this calculus—all of the Big Three offer partner benefits, and have no intention of doing away with them anytime soon.

So, I say go ahead and boycott Ford (I’d be interested to know what AFA Chairman Don Wildmon drives, by the way)—it will work just as well as the AFA’s boycott of Disney, which is to say, not at all.

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* And that’s not just because my paycheck is signed by a Ford competitor that isn’t DaimlerChrysler

Labels: LGBT

annamaria at 10:58 AM